My version of meditating is playing computer games. I play, zone out, and while I'm zoned out, I turn various things over in my mind. It's relaxing and I get things solved that way. I ruminate on relationships, or I solve design problems in my jewelry, or I think about the state of the world. One of the things I had been thinking about, but not so much in the last few days, is a very toxic relationship that ended at the beginning of the summer. It was with a woman I used to work with, who...is very messed up. She had, to be perfectly fair, a horrible family life--her parents regularly reminded her that she was a mistake. Not an accident, but a mistake. Okay. She ended up with borderline personality disorder (diagnosed by my therapist daughter) and she latched on to me as a secondary mother figure. I have issues of my own, so I let this go one, for far too long. I have ruminated on the details, and, as rumninants do, I think I've managed to shit most of it out, ...